AAGGGGHHHHHHHH
My parents are in the kitchen talking about MY pond as if its THEIRS, I told them about an hour ago not to touch the filter or anything as i was going to get dressed go out and do it myself as its MY pond. so i come out the bathroom and they've decided to do it all AND muck it up. I was going to lower the lily to the bottom but dad did it and dropped it and spilt muck and gravel everywhere. hes set the filter running in there but with no media as i didnt want it in there yet. now they keep coming in and telling me to give it to them so they can put it in there because 'they know better'. ok so they've had fish in tanks and ponds before, but they know NOTHING about cycling etc. and im taking it slowly (well, trying) because i dont want to rush and do it wrong.. i dont want the media in there yet because i haven't bought any fish to keep it cycled, let alone QTed them. Its hanging in the goldfish tank getting a headstart with the bacteria, but theres no point explaining that to them.. because 'they know better'.
They told me that i was in charge of the running, maintainance, water and fish of this pond, but i had to get approval of them for anything decor, as it has to fit in with the rest of the garden, which is fine by me.. but ARRGGGHHHHHH.

euh, now their friend has come over and they are sitting round MY pond, looking at MY pond talking about how moody I am and talking about MY pond.

Lucy,

First, I will admit that I am a 45 year old parent of a 16 year old young man. And I imagine that there's a few things I do that give him the "ARRGGGHHHHHH" feeling. Right about this time is when young adult children and parents tend to end up with no common interests. When I'm working on my pond, my son comes out and looks at it - then cruises away to do something else. But we have a couple other common interests - and just started a new one, so we're ok.

For you, the pond project you are jointly developing is a common interest. So it's frustrating I know that you have different ideas - but it's an opportunity to accomplish and enjoy something together for a long time. You're lucky it's a pond and not a 20 gallon tank. Because a pond is large, it has a lot of - well - inertia is the word that comes to mind. It's not easy to "muck it up" once it's up and running properly. I understand the spilled gravel and soil from the lily could be upsetting, but that would eventually happen anyway.

Your parents want to get the filter going and move forward, you want to take time and develop a balanced environment. You're both enthusiastic about the same objectives, but you have different tactics. It's hard to run a team project that way. Try to get them to have a pond meeting when disagreements happen. You can all decide on common goals - then agree on tactics. Tell them the pond can be a really nice joint project, or it can become a constant source of contention - don't let it become the latter.

And as with many things, there is often a compromise. Here is the compromise for your current situation - Microbe Lift Gel Bacteria or something similar that's available in England. Tell them you should have some of that handy, it will vastly speed up the "cycling" you want to accomplish. Plus, if something happens and the balance of the pond gets wacky, it's amazing how quick a big dose of the right bacteria and enzymes will set everything right in a pond.

Remember, make this a project that you can enjoy together with your parents. Make common goals. When you don't agree on tactics, find a compromise. And relax, once the pond gets going it will almost take care of itself, except for an hour or so of care and maintenance a week.

Last thing. You might try printing this out and giving it to them at your first pond meeting.

Have fun,

Thanks Daniel.
I'm not going to compromise any more with them, i already did, that i was in charge of anything related to the fish, so filter water and underwater plants, and they agreed and now they've just taken over, and im not having it. I dont like being messed about and having my time wasted, and if i do this their way i will have time and money gone down the drain.
Sorry for my rant.

I do have a question, i know theres a thread on it but its not really making much sense to me. Do you have to do regular water changes on a pond? This is also another thing we are disagreeing on, dad says theres no way he will let me do them once a week as he "knows people with ponds who never do water changes and their fish survive." See, i've tried and tried and tried to explain the difference between 'survive' and 'thrive' ..but im not getting anywhere.

I am not going to take sides. I am just going to say this, yes you should cycle. The microbe lift idea given by Daniel is a good one and I hope that you do get some sort of bacteria that is comparable to it (don't think you can get microbe lift there?) because it really will help your pond. You do need to do a 10% water change once a week (contrary to popular belief) because a man made pond is not a natural body of water.

In order to keep your pond healthy these are the things you need to do;

1. You really should cycle it, and put fish in slowly, two at a time.
2. Buy Microbe lift or something comparable. You'll put this stuff in once a week and it does keep a good balance in your pond.
3. 10% water change once a week, without any fresh water coming in (like a natural pond) you have to take some out and replace with fresh. What is happening in your pond is the minerals are being leached out by fish and plants. You will put these minerals back in the pond when you put in fresh water. These minerals are needed to keep your fish and pond healthy, I do believe that you could have a pH crash if the minerals are totally leached out (I could be wrong I don't have my books here for reference).
4. Water chemistry test kit. Very important, you need to know the Ph, Nitrite level, and ammonia level in your pond. Especially now since you have a new system. Your nitrites are going to be going all overt the place. Without knowing what is going on in the system you could get into trouble. I would put 3% salt in the pond just to be safe.
5. When you clean your filter clean it with pond water, just clean it so it's not clogging up, you don't want to knock off good bacteria.

There are some other things that I can think of, but not sure if they are as important.

I am sure that you may have eventually had an accident with the lily pot spilling over, I've done it several times in my pond and it makes me angry! Of course I can only be mad at myself.

Daniel is right though you should try and get along with your parents on this project. Your parents may not be totally right but that is because they haven't been educated on how to care for a pond. You need to educate them so that they understand. Once they become educated then you can be mad at them when they do it wrong . I hate to see you get upset over something that really is a lot of fun. Send your parents here, or there are other websites such as koivet.com that has a lot of info. koicarp.com is a very good site that is from England. They just need to be taught on how to care for the pond.


Goodluck! Remember this is the best hobby one can have and being able to share it with others makes it all the more enjoyable. Educate your family.
Scott

Scott is the expert. His pond is awesome.

I've just got a cool puddle in a barrel.



I've only just used the enzymes and topped off with distilled water. You've got a lot more volument than me though. My PH is starting to decline though, so I'll need to get more minerals in the water now.

Thankyou.
They dont want to learn though, they think they know it all.
I'm just gonna get on with it, maybe try and show them some hard proof of what im trying to tell them.. like on one of those sites (thanks for them ).
They've stopped yelling at me.. so thats a start.

Is it me or it the thingy not showing the last reply?

So how's the pond doing? Do you have anymore picture updates?

Scott

sorry
The camera batteries are flat and i cant find the charger.. or new batteries, when i do, its the first thing i will do.

oh. Just remember that we are looking forward to seeing how your pond progresses.

Scott

My first slippery visitor


We got a zebra rush (i think)


..and some grass


I'm quite peeved with my lilly, the leaves are coming up all munched round the edges could there be something down there eating them?

hehe, mum's silly wooden ducks..


This stuff is growing over the edge, i like it, its making the pond into part of the garden, if you get what i mean





The garden has blooooooooomed with leaves!!!

I was just out taking those photos in the sun thinking i'll go out after and wash more pebbles for round the edge.. and it started raining.

The pond is looking great so far.For some odd reason though,I adore the frog

Hehe, thought you might, he used to live under the shed but i think we've given him a much better place to hang out

Yes I love the frog as well, he's a big fog! I'm thinking that your fish are having salad. They like to do that with lilies. When the weather gets warmer the leaves will come up faster so that problem wont be so bad. At least that is the way it is with my pond.

WOW did everything take off. Your pond is looking wonderful, very nice job! It's beautiful, thanks for the update.

Scott

it looks fantastic!

The wooden ducks are funny

Thanks guys
..I would supect fish to be eating the lillys.. thing is.. there aren't any fish yet!
I forgot to add params, for the heck of it really since its not ready for fish, ammonia 0.5, nitrite 0.5, nitrate 10, pH 8.. as of two days ago. Still need to add the media to the filter!

Mr. Ribbit ..hes been there every day now, he was sat in a crease in the liner watching me wash pebbles all afternoon.


Full views from different angles








I put the media in the filter as I've had enough of it floating around in the goldie tank. I've washed all the pebbles and put them round the edge.. so no more liner, yay!
I scooped all the blossom and leaves from the bottom.
I also changed the fountain head so its a fountain now, just looks much better than that strange umbrella effect it has in those pics.
Hopefully going to find a place that has Wakin in or can order for me tomorrow (its going to be a rare/uncommon fish pond! ..Wakin, Jikin, Bristol Shubunkin).

Edit: Mum wants me to change some of the water as its stained so brown, its hard to see the bottom.. but I'm not sure if I need to as tests are ok, no extreme of pH etc. what do you think? I dont know the hardness or anything, but doesnt a higher pH mean harder water?

The ponds looking great
am also fond of the wakins
and i see Mr norton is still waiting

That looks fab Luc
Its a shame you live all the way down there, we have some totally GORGEOUS bristol shubs that would look so great in your pond they are just too massive to post.... maybe in october though you should let me know if you want one, i can bring one down for FOFK....

Would you do that for me!? that'd be soooo cool if they still have them in october absolutely! ..and I'll pay anything!!!

i sure would honey they have one thats especially gorgeous i can prolly reserve him

Hi Lucy! I can't believe your pond! I read this thread when you were just starting out and before it was even dug (remember then?!) and now its all up and beautiful with the first resident frog already installed-btw does he have a name yet?, not to mention your Moms cute ducks (I love those!!! )It really looks terrific, in the sun and also in the rain. I hope you an get the fish you want from tinkerbell..and we get to see pics of course. Congratulations

really nice pond well docmented

Thanks guys
Trinket, I've been calling him Mr. Jeremy Ribbit
Alice, d'ya think they reserve him for 4 months!? I might have to pay his rent

well, i'll give it a go... the manager is my ex-boyf, so he'll do me a favour

lol cheers ..what does he look like then? (the fish not the ex )

Edit: I'm looking for lots of black in the tail 'n' stuff like this one http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid1...64/f635f4a0.jpg

OMG! Lucy you must have read my mind! i was going to post that pic up (from bristol aquarists right?) and say he looked a bit like that!! wow... thats weird!

wow thats great!



I just did a goOgle search

You're great, thankyou!

my pleasure hunni

oo, and before i forget, choccies on the way... posted it this morn

.. aw and another one, you're the best!

What a gorgeous pond you got there, Lucy!! I just adore it, especially how its all integrated in the garden. I'd do nothing else but sit there and enjoy the view.
And you'll be a happy camper with some bristols, those are wonderful fish. How about shoving some in an water tight envelope and send them my way?

Thanks Andrea, I can just imagine an envelop flipping its way across the door mat!

we all have to go see Andreas fish sometime

The pond is lovely Lucy!! Im jealous!

Thanks Erin

Hey Lucy, ive only just seen this post ive just read it from the start and wowee it looks amazing!! My mums letting me do a pond just like yours (finally) and im defo gonna have to show her these pictures!!

When do you think you will be getting some fish to put in there?

Any tips on pond making would be good aswel thanks

xxx

Thanks Tanya
I'll be getting the Wakin quite soon, within the next few weeks i hope (i just need a chance to get up to the shop they have them, its quite far).. and Alice has reserved the Bristol Shub for me so he/she will be coming down in october yay!
The Wakin will have some temporary buddies in that time though, as long as the (theres a thread called 'natural pond' on here) fish/pond rescue goes ahead!

How big's yours gonna be?
I'd advise to not go cheap on the liner, get one of the thick rubber butyl thingys, PVC leaks!

cool sounds good. ermmm im not sure how big its going to be, not huge. Just a corner one in my garden. Hopefully the bunnys wont go for a swim lol.

Look at this thing!!


We just found it swimming about.. it has a massive sucking mouth type thing at one end (which somehow resembles the back end of a cat) and an airhole tube type thing at the other.. it has lots of little caterpillar type feet things and it looks like a swimming maggot.
Any idea what it is?
I think maybe its what has been eating my lilly leaves.. I was right! There's a horribe lilly eating creature at the bottom of my pond! I'm guessing there are more of these guys in there?
..i'm getting the heeby jeebies looking at him



I might keep him and see what he turns into, like a fly or something..

Anyhow.. since I last posted I have seen my first damsel fly..


Since then I've seen lots more, including blue ones and a massive dragon fly
We also have a second frog, a lot smaller than the first, so i'm guessing the first is female and second male.. I think they are planning a family for next spring! I would have a pic of him but he swam off as I stood up to go get the camera.



Edit: spelling.

I once found a Mayfly larvae in my little pond. Kinda spooky looking thing.

Mayfly's are cool (like the new avatar by the way )

Mum suggested I put some guppies in there while a wait to get the goldfish.. but I said I didnt have any guppies.. but I do have a shoal of zebra danios that need a new home, so the pond is now home to 18 danios for a while They were quite pleased to be moved from 6 gallons of water to 180 They are shoaling around happily, they should keep my filter bacteria reasonably alive, since theres, ermm.. 1 per 9 gallons I think..

wot a strange wee creature

i've had something nibbling on my arum lily but my water liley is fine!

would love to see some pics of your danios in the pond!!!!

i'll try and get some pics of them, the swim so fast in there.. and the water is still brown.
One isnt looking too good, shes (the mum of all of them) has just been getting thinner and thinner, now she wont eat, shes looking awful this morning.. might have to say buh-bye to her today